BALENTINE MEMOIRS

When I work out at the YMCA on Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings, I typically listen to podcast sermons.  A few weeks ago, I was listening to a sermon on pride that was truly convicting.  Toward the end of the sermon, the preacher said something that made me feel as if a cold bucket of ice water had been dumped on my head.  He said, "If you have been listening to this sermon and have been thinking about someone else the whole time, and how that person needs to fix their issues with pride - guess what - you have a pride problem."  My mind was doing just that up until the moment he held a mirror in front of my face.  I was thinking, I should share this sermon with "him" or "her" so they can start to work on themselves.  I was envisioning people's faces when the pastor described what pride looked like, and I was thinking, "That poor person just doesn't get it.  They're so prideful they can't see past themselves!"  When in fac...

Tonight marks three months since we’ve held Simon – but more importantly, it marks three months since Simon was loving placed in our Creator’s arms.   I feel like today is the perfect day to share Simon’s celebration of life service which took place on June 14, 2014 at our church home, Christ Community Brookside Campus.   We are so thankful for Ben Hollon, videographer, who donated his time and talents to recording the celebration.   Thank you for capturing this moment in our lives.   We are humbled by the outpouring of love through our friend, Jose, pastor Bill, music and worship pastor John, and all of the unbelievably talented musicians and singers without whom the service wouldn’t be the same.   Thank you to all of the volunteers who made the time after the service truly a celebration with cake, cookies and beverages.   We thank all of you who were with us in person (loved seeing everyone in blue!) and in spirit – you helped us stand tall this day. ...

I woke up early this morning (Aug. 15th), determined to set my eyes on the San Francisco Bay.  To come to the City and not see it would just feel wrong to me.  My trip is very condensed.  I’m here for just 24 hours.  I sit on a park bench I’ve sat on many times before, watching the ferries come and go as they shuttle commuters to and from the City.  As I gaze out on the waters that roll beneath the grey, foggy sky I think about why I miss San Francisco.  Certainly I have deep nostalgic longings for my old life here - a time when everything seemed right.  But that’s the funny thing about nostalgia.  Nostalgia clouds your judgement of that past and forces you to remember the good.  I went through some very difficult times early  during  my tenure  in San Francisco.  On the very park bench I sit in now, I had many a phone conversation with my parents where I felt like I was at the end of my rope.  At certain points I ...

Since Simon’s memorial, God has been asking me to be silent and listen to Him.   Not be idle, but do all that I can to hear Him.   I’m trying to hear Him by spending time in The Word.   I find myself wanting the pain to be passed and naïvely dreaming of when the hurt might “go away.”   But in that same thought, I don’t want to speed through the grief.   I know He’s refining and restoring me through the valley ( 1 Peter 1:6-9 ).   So I continue to wait and listen and wait and listen ( Isa 30:18 ).   One thing that has been placed on my heart is to be in continuous thanksgiving.   I am typically in and out of prayer with the Lord throughout the day, more of a dialog.   It’s been this way for me for some time, however, I usually didn’t thank God for every little thing.    So I am choosing to acknowledge and give thanks to for everything – after all, every blessing flows from him.   So I have been focusing on thanki...

“A rebuke goes deeper into a man of understanding than a hundred blows to a fool.”   Proverbs 17:10 (ESV) Where have all the good listeners gone?  How do I become a better listener?  Listening is both a choice and a skill.  It seems that nobody is learning and nobody is choosing it these days.  This truly isn’t an emotional rant based on some recent interaction I had, it is more of an observation over several years that our culture seems to be producing generations of bad listeners. I’ve heard it said that in a typical group setting, no one person can talk for more than 15-20 seconds before being interrupted.  If you have something valuable or insightful to say, you better say it FAST!  Even if you are able to get your words of wisdom out in such a short time frame, how do you know that the receiver even processed or understood what you were saying? Active listening skills teach us that there is importance in acknowledging what the other pe...

Amy and I were talking the other night as we enjoyed one of the many meals that someone from our church family brought to us. {Side note: thank you to all who have fed us over the last several weeks.  It has been a huge blessing!}  The topic Amy and I discussed was “change.”  Of course, the two of us have been radically changed by Simon.  We know that others are seeing things in a new light and are thinking and acting differently as well.  But how can this change be sustained?  How do we live-out the rest of our days without slipping back into our old, uninspired ways? A few friends have told me that peoples’ attention spans for death typically last about three weeks.  That is to say, the supporters and comforters tend to move on and hop back into their old routines after a few weeks of giving focused attention to the grievers.  But for the griever there is no “moving on.” No closure.  There is only the turning of a page.  As we...

This video is a slideshow of actual quotes we have received from you, our friends and our family.  This slideshow was played during Simon's Celebration of Life as John Brewer and the worship band played "Below My Feet" live.   These are your words (quotes from Simon's friends) from Adam and Amy Balentine on Vimeo . Over the last 10 months, we have been the recipients of some amazing words from family, friends and complete strangers.  You have been vulnerable.  You have decided to shed a piece of your old self and become something new.  You have opened yourself up to feel our pain, but also our hope and our joy.  Expressing this to us - taking the time to write or speak the words you have expressed - lifts up some of the weight of depression, death and emptiness we've felt (and continue to feel).   We've been equipped to support and build up the body of followers of Christ.  We've been given the same words - the same education as the ...